Ramblings of a Creative Mind

Thoughts on Work and the World from an Executive Mom

Monthly Archives: September 2013


by Leave a comment

Father Knows Best

DadSo, now it is Dad’s turn to celebrate another birthday – perhaps a little unwillingly.  That tends to happen more and more as life goes along, I guess.  The family gathered at his house to share his special day.  Have I mentioned that my family is rather large?  There were seven of us kids there (and that’s not the entire crew), not to mention the kids by marriage, assorted boy/girlfriends and grandkids here, there and everywhere, two dogs, two cats… You get the drift.  It was extremely loud with all of those lives everywhere. Every table was heavily laden with food (it’s a Francisco Family tradition). Fingers big and small made music on the keyboard, and voices lifted in harmony as the organ dimly played its fading bossa nova beat in the background as we passed by.  In other words, it was home.

We came together in a dance so familiar to celebrate the man that unites us all.  We had a great time, one that I am reminiscing about now as I sit in my quiet home – close and still too far away.  So tonight, I wanted to share a few things about my Dad that still serve as life lessons for me today.

1.  Small people make a big impact. When I was a child, my Dad towered over me like a giant.  Dads do that.  As I have grown, I have come to realize that many members of my family are “vertically challenged”, myself included.  Yet, while my Dad may be small in stature, he has made a significant difference in the lives of many people beyond just our family members.  When Dad moved to the States, he soon became a small town doctor.  That small town doctor brought life to generations after generations as he delivered them in homes, in hospitals and out in the local Hutterite communities.  Doc Eddie still reigns supreme in borders well beyond those he knows, as others live today thanks to the work he did.  The magnitude can’t be measured, and it is real, meaningful and eternal.

2. You don’t have to show off to prove your worth.  Dad is a genius – literally. That can be rather humbling to a kid who thinks they know it all.  Yet, Dad never mentioned it… Not once.  He never really touted his accomplishments; he didn’t have to.  He demonstrated who he was in his actions, and others touted it for him… usually to his embarrassment.  And he never made his know it all child feel down.  He knew when to win, and knew when he needed to let you win. That’s a hard one for me, and I’m working on it. There’s no benefit in always being right. It’s impossible, and hurtful too.

3.  Know when to work, and know when to play. Children of doctors know the routine – the early mornings, late nights, even later emergency calls from the answering service. There was no doubt that Dad was always on during the week.  But Dad also knew when to call a time out.  My favorite silly day, one among many, was on my twelfth birthday.  I sat at the kitchen table with my homebaked cake, my brothers and sisters, wearing a cowboy hat, when a giant yell came from the stairwell.  Out bounded Dad in a much too small matching cowboy hat, brandishing irons (a fork and spoon) and whooping that he was the birthday bandit.  He was exhausted and on call that night, but I never would have known it.  He made time stop for me and for the family.  Work hard, yes, but there are times that everything else can wait.

4. Silence often means more than words. Dad pretty much does not speak. He is known for one word sentences at most, but more often – if we asked him a question – his response would be a nod, a lift of an eyebrow, or pointing with his lips. It’s a Filipino thing. “Dad, want some ice cream?” Nod. “Strawberry or chocolate?” Lift left eyebrow twice. “You got it, Dad.” He is a quiet man, but says so much without a word. I sat down next to him today, leaned against him, put my head on his shoulder – and with one simple pat on my hand, he said more about how he felt and his love than a million flowery poems or this blog ever could. Words are often overrated. Dad shows his love instead with a gentle touch, and through his endless cooking of pots of adobo, plates of pancit and piles of lumpia. You never go hungry, belly or soul. People show love in different ways. How open are you to receiving it?

5. Don’t forget to dance. We are pre-iPod, CD and cassette. Yet, Mom loved music on at all times (probably to mute the sounds of us crazies), so Dad installed a radio in the kitchen, hanging underneath the cabinet. It would play in the background every night. Then, after the food was gone and the dishes washed, magic would happen. Several nights a week, a song would come on that Mom loved, and Dad was swoop her into his arms, waltzing her around the kitchen in a grandiose arc. Then, he’d pull her close to him, sway softly and sing Julio Iglesias or “Dahil Sa Iyo”gently as an eerie quiet would fall over us all. Life goes by too quickly, and the days run together and are soon forgotten. Yet, those fleeting minutes are magic. Don’t forget to dance.

Here’s to you, Dad. Thank you for the food, the Angels, the unexpected piano concertos and the karaoke marathons.

You are the best.


by Leave a comment

Five Steps for Making Every Moment Matter

Bracelets_of_powerSo, I think about relationships and leadership a lot.  After all, any kind of selling – whether you’re selling to businesses or people – is really about building a relationship.  Relationships are founded on milestones: your first date, taking a trip or buying your first car.  Yet, relationships are forged on the moments that come in between.  It’s the small things that you do such as smile a special smile, sharing a joke or opening a door, that speak to who you are and how the person with you feels when they are around you. Now, every business person today has heard from industry “experts” that loyalty is dead.  Gen X and Y folks may have eight or more “banking” relationships.  They don’t care about what make and model of car they drive etc.  According to many, the days of loyalty are fading fast.  Do you buy into that?  I don’t.  Take a look at your favorite sports team.  Take a look at their fan base.  Among that loyal fanbase – the jersey wearing face painted nation – are people of all ages.  Heck, my 5 year old can recite Kobe’s stats and recently schooled me on Metta World Peace.  And my house is part of the Spurs Nation.  What happened there?

So why aren’t more of your current clients, loyal clients?  Are you making every moment matter?

Now, I’m from a small town in South Dakota where you don’t lock your doors, where you know everyone (and their business) and where you go to the same store to purchase whatever you may need every time.  People still wave and say hello when you coast on by.  And if you burn a bridge, you probably just burned that bridge with half of the town as word spreads quickly.  Every moment matters. In today’s hypercompetitive economy, technology keeps people with us all the time – kind of like that same small town.  People you haven’t seen in decades “wave” as you pass by on Facebook, and one bad review or relationship turns into a thousand if not properly tended.  Today, you must always be aware, providing better and faster service to improve loyalty and keep your clients happy.  There are always opportunities to make magic moments each time you work with someone.

Tell Your Story
Every time you speak with someone, reinforce why your service is the best and what sets you apart.  After all, you work where you work because you believe in the greater purpose or mission.  It’s a basic human need to believe in something.  Share proudly why people should believe in you.
Show How Much You Care
Find sincere ways to show your clients how much you value them and how your product or service helps protect and care for them.  Every product is designed to meet some basic need.  What need does your product satisfy?  What problem does is cure?  How important is it to you personally that they are protected?  Make sure they know.
Everyone Walks Away With A Smile The path to happiness is a short one.  It starts with you being happy.  How happy do you feel when you sit down across from someone?  Is anything getting in the way of your good mood?  If so, get rid of it.  Is your desk cluttered?  Perhaps your mind is cluttered.  If you’re in a bad mood in the morning, find a token to remind you to change your frame of mind.  Mine is a set of rubber bracelets I picked up at a conference last year.  I call them my “Bracelets of Power.”  They tell me that “No Negativity is Allowed” and “Success is My Duty.”  I glance down at them, get a reminder, and put a smile on my face.  No matter how long someone has known you, every time they see you again, there is a tiny little adjustment in how they view you – a tiny judgment.  Make sure it’s a good one.  (Thanks to Grant Cardone for the token.)
Meet People Where They Are Most of your younger clients today grew up with both in person and digital relationships.  They’re comfortable in that space, and they expect you to be too.  Why ask them to go out of their comfort zone to meet you?  You’ve just added another hurdle to your success.  Just like the Country Doctor (AKA my Dad) did back in South Dakota, go to your client instead.  Do they want to meet in person?  Great.  E-mail?  Great.  Text message?  I’d bet a lot of people would appreciate it.  That’s what I prefer, and the fastest way to reach me frankly.  Then, great.  Getting outside of your comfort zone and into theirs helps build that elusive loyalty factor.  You’re placing their needs first.
People Remember Mistakes: No matter how good you are, sooner or later, you will let someone down.  Don’t let one bad experience ruin someone’s opinion of you or your Company.  Mistakes usually happen when you are distracted, whether it’s in multitasking and emailing while you are on a call or just a bit of mental drift near the end of a long day.  Remember, every moment matters.  Focus on the here and now when you are with someone.  Everything else can wait.  People have long memories in small towns and online, the world’s biggest small town.  And if you don’t have people that believe in you, you won’t have a business.  When you do make that dreaded mistake, please apologize.  Yes, it’s good manners.  Yes, it should be natural, but often we may get defensive.  Ultimately, that never helps.  A sincere, heartfelt and humble apology will go a long way to rebuilding a damaged relationship and creating a raving fan instead.
Make every moment matter.  It’s hard work, but it’s good work.  And it’s work that pays dividends both professionally and personally.
So how will you make it matter today?

 


by Leave a comment

How to Run a Marathon

Marathon“Make no little plans; they have no magic to stir men’s blood and probably will themselves not be realized.  Make big plans; aim high in hope and work, remembering that a noble, logical diagram once recorded will not die”. — Daniel H. Burnham

Have you ever run a marathon?  About ten years ago, I decided I was going to do it to raise money for a charity.  At the time, everyone I knew thought I’d lost my mind.  Now, I am not an athletic person; in fact, I am rather clumsy and tend to bump into things – a lot.  So taking on 26.2 miles was definitely going to be a major challenge, and one that required considerable training and planning.  And so I began – running with a team each week in increasingly longer distances towards our mutual goal.  Running a marathon not only requires a goal and physical and mental conditioning, but tactical planning too: choosing the right shoes, maintaining a safe pace, packing items to stay hydrated and maintain your sodium and glycogen levels so you can finish safely.  (Legend says that Pheidippides, whose famous run is the foundation for today’s distance, collapsed and died at the end – and who wants that?)  It also involves checking in with yourself on a regular basis to make sure your plan is working, and making adjustments as needed.

Your work life is no different.  You’ve decided to run the Career Marathon.  Now, let’s plan how you’ll make it to the finish line.  There are four steps to creating your plan.

1.   Create your purpose statement.  Your Company helps here.  If you don’t know what the Company’s Mission, Philosophy and Goals are, find out.  If you don’t know the goal, you don’t know where you are going.
2.   Envision your future.  You need to be specific and descriptive.  For example, say you’re in sales, delivering 10 widgets a month, and you want to boost your results.  Picture yourself delivering 20 widgets a month, every month.  Your accounts are excited when you come in to visit.  You get referrals from every client.  They write great reviews about you on Google / Facebook / Yelp.  You make $XXX dollars this year, and take a vacation to Hawaii with your family, etc. Write it up and post it on your mirror.  Post it everywhere.  If it is always in front of you, it helps keep you focused.
3.   Describe your current reality.  Now’s the time to be brutally honest with yourself.  You should be so honest that you may not want to show this to anyone but yourself.  Where are you today?    Maybe you write something like: “I haven’t been out marketing for over a month.  I didn’t call 3 clients back.  I’m uncomfortable asking for referrals.”  Whatever it is, if you are honest with yourself about what you do today, it will help you plan for success.
4.   Make specific commitments.  Bullet point the action steps you are going to take to get to the future you want.  “I will go marketing every Tuesday.  I will touch bases with every lead before the end of the day. I will ask for a testimonial.”  Whatever you commit to, you’ve just made a promise to yourself, so you can achieve what you want.
Plans and goals are excellent, but they are also worthless unless you review them on a regular basis.  You have to check in to make sure you are staying on task.  One of the best ways you can do this is to set up a “Weekly Status Update.”  Let’s be honest.  When you’re as busy as you are today, it’s easy to lose your way and become reactive instead of proactive.  You may forget to follow up with a member when the phones are ringing off the hook or don’t review your notes from your last marketing visit.  When that happens, important things fall through the cracks.  You end up embarrassed, or worse, you may let your members, your credit union, the Company and yourself down.
When you set up your “Weekly Status Update,” you give yourself a chance to get ahead of the game and see how well you are progressing towards your Marathon Goal.  You stay on top of things, instead of running to catch up.  I like to schedule 1-2 hours for my weekly review.  Now, it never takes that long, but if you book it you’re your calendar, you’ll get it done.  So what is your agenda for your meeting with yourself?
1.   Review your referrals.  Have you checked in with everyone?  Is there someone you need to call today?  Stay on top of this, and you won’t have any “heat” issues.
2.   Review all of the notes you’ve kept over the week.  I’m low tech, and use a notebook as e-mail reminders get lost in the Inbox.  Quickly read back through your notes to see if there are any action items or things that you needed to do.
3.   Review your calendar from last week.  Were there any things you promised your credit unions on your marketing visits?  Notes from your sales meeting?  This will jog your memory and help you catch up as well.  Did you miss an appointment?  Better reschedule it.
4.   Review this week’s calendar.  This is one of the most important steps.  It allows you to plan in advance, stay ahead of the curve and keep your sales momentum on track.
5.   Review your Action Lists.  What do you really need to accomplish this week?  Book it.
6.   Review your Marathon Goal. Remind yourself that you’re headed to the Finish Line.  If you stay focused, you’ll be a winner.

 


by Leave a comment

Number 5

What do you believe in?

What do you believe in?

When I was a young manager, early in my career, I remember having a conversation with a fellow employee who was upset about a change in procedure from the top.  She came to me in confidence and, after I listened to what she had to say, I tried to help.  I remember telling her that she needed to separate her emotions from the equation, that business was business and – this part I remember quite vividly – that a Company is a Company.  It’s not a person.  It has no emotional intent or motivation, and that if she realized that then she would be able to see the logic behind Upper Management’s decision, etc.  I thought it was good advice.

And maybe it was ten years ago.  Back then, the book du jour was The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene.  It was a different time… Just after the dot-com hullabaloo.  Social media was in its infancy.  The world was riding high; business and home values on the rise.  What a ride it was then.  Fast, hard driving, me, me, me.

I see things very differently today.  Great things are happening at work; we are on the precipice of a fantastic new chapter in our future.  And yet this afternoon, I found myself wrestling with some significant business choices.  So, I went to my mentor for advice and guidance.  (If you don’t have a business mentor, get one tomorrow.  Run!  It will be one of the most significant investments you will ever make in yourself and in your future.) And as I walked through it with my mentor, out of nowhere, I felt a huge swell of emotion – one that was hard to contain.   I finished the conversation, sucking it up and telling myself that “no one cries in baseball.”  I am still unsettled.  And as I work through it (which will take some time), I thought of that advice from so long ago… And thought about what I would say to that teammate today.

Yes, business is business.  But business is a combination of the head and the heart.  I am farther along in my career, and today I am one of the people making those decisions that are lasting… which have meaning to lives beyond my own.  I have a responsibility to those lives… to those people. I’m invested in them.  I know them, know their dreams, know their fears and I share their sorrows.   They are teammates, employees, friends and more often than I would admit, they are family.  We don’t just work together; we have real relationships.  It’s a heck of a lot harder carrying the weight of all of those hearts.  But I am a better manager today because I carry that load.  Business is about emotions, and to be successful today, you have to connect emotionally to those you serve.

Tonight, as I worked though all of these conflicted emotions, I looked up at the core values posted on my wall.  We all have them at our offices (and hopefully memorized), but do you have them at home? My son and I defined our Family Core Values when he was 3. And looking at them today, they’re pretty good. It’s a mantra at home with buy in from the boys. Tonight, I think they are pretty good for work too. They’re emotionally based. So is work.

Business is just a collection of people after all.
And people are pretty special.

 


by Leave a comment

Finding Monday Motivation

Have you ever felt like this on Monday morning?

Have you ever felt like this on Monday morning?

When I am in the office, I follow a pretty strict structure in the morning.  I get in early so I can get started while things are still quiet.  I spend the first 15 minutes getting situated, writing out what I want/need to accomplish in my day, then ranking the projects in order of importance.  Who do I need to call back?  What deliverables are due today?  Then, I spend the next 30 minutes or so doing research about the automotive and credit union industries.  After all, my company serves both of those industries and, as its representative, it’s my job to be an expert.  I spend about 30 minutes looking ahead at the next few weeks – what do I need to do to achieve my goals?  Is there any prep work I need to do for my clients? Finally, I decompress for a few minutes, and then launch into the day, full steam ahead.  My days and weeks are very structured for a reason.  Why?  The structure provides the foundation I need to excel on great days and to make it through the tougher ones.

Sometimes, no matter how good your intentions, getting started on a Monday morning can be a rough go.  Perhaps it’s winding down from a busy weekend or winding up from a slow one.  Maybe you have a lot on your plate for that week, and the tasks seem overwhelming.  Today, I feel like I am wading through mud.  My desk is piled high with a million little items that need attention, and although I have gotten a lot done, it still feels like I have struggled today to accomplish anything.  Kind of a contradiction, to be sure.  So what do I have to fall back on when I just can’t get going?  Structure, plus a little inspiration.  I looked back over my notes from the morning, cranked up the deep, funky house (sorry to my teammates), and just started pushing things forward.

My days are not much different from yours.  You take stock of whatever you need to accomplish.  In sales, that’s probably your leads, marketing visits and scheduled presentations or more.  You research your product as you are the expert.  You research your prospects and plan your next few weeks – when can you go out marketing and who do you need to follow up with.  Although you may feel like you’re wading through mud too, you’re actually walking along a straight path to success when you structure your day.  And your phone starts ringing.

Even when life is good (and car sales sure are good right now), there are challenges – from the annoying to the earth-shattering.  Structuring your day provides a foundation for you to move things forward when the going gets a little rough – say for example, you have an unexpected complication at work or you’re feeling under the weather.  It is far too easy to let things derail you, especially if they are new, you are tired, you have a ton of leads or it’s a Monday.  Solid, consistent structure or processes give you something to fall back on, to help you get started.  But you may need more – you need inspiration.
Inspiration comes in many forms.  Perhaps you read motivational books, take a quick walk around the office or crank up the tunes like I do.  It doesn’t matter where you find inspiration; it just matters that you do.  We can’t expect that anyone else will find it for us.  We need to take charge of our day and our life, be accountable and crank up the volume.  This life is far too short to sit and wait for something to come our way.  Yes, some things are out of our control, but a lot of life is in our control.  Grab hold of the reins, go marketing (blast that beat) and get going.  You just might find that Monday Morning Motivation* along the way.
*A special thanks goes out to Seattle’s C89.5 for the techno wake up call today!  Again, sorry to everyone here at the office!


by Leave a comment

Happy Hopping

CheeringToday, prior to coming in to work, I attended a Hop-a-Thon to raise funds for the Muscular Dystrophy Association.  Let me tell you, there are few things in this world that are cuter than a group of three to five year olds hopping their hearts out inside of hula hoops for charity.  Seriously, adorable.  So, my job as one of the volunteer “coaches” was to stand by one of the hoops and count how many times each child hopped in one minute.  One by one, they came up to accept their challenge – Rodney, Jake, Shae, Taeya.  One by one, each waited for the bell.  And when it rang, they began.  Now, for a four year old, a minute is an eternity.  So, “Coach Marci” counted and yelled.  “TEN!  TWENTY!  THIRTY!”  As the numbers got higher, they hopped faster – wanting to hit a hundred.  And when they passed one hundred and heard “ONE TEN!  ONE TWENTY!” they hopped even harder.  The crowd of parents and classmates cheered louder.  When the bell rang after the minute was up, our exhausted and elated athletes stepped out of the rings with huge smiles of achievement on their faces.  And many of them stepped up to try it again, hopping for a second or even a third time.  Even a few of us Moms joined them.  Go, Team Mom!

When the last hop had been hopped and the parents began to disperse, one of the members of Team Mom stopped me.  Out of the blue, she mentioned this blog.  She gave me such a wonderful compliment that I never expected and I walked away on air, my spirits lifted and creative juices flowing.  Truth be known, all week, I’ve been having a bit of writer’s block about this blog.  I haven’t felt very creative.  In fact, I’ve been in a bit of a funk in general – feeling undervalued, underappreciated etc.  Once that spiral of under-whatever starts, it’s easy to start seeing it everywhere you look: at work, at home, in life.  Everything seems to validate that negative thinking or emotion.

I was a “coach” this morning, and I’m a coach often at work and at home.  I’m a big believer in positive reinforcement as a primary motivational tool.  I consciously make it a point each and every day to speak words of appreciation to my husband, my kids, my coworkers and employees.  I specifically look for something to sincerely compliment when I’m out networking with strangers; it opens doors.   But it looks like I forgot this week that I need positive reinforcement too.  I also forgot to listen.  Good feedback was there from my husband at home, but I have been so busy having a mini-pity party this week, that I didn’t hear it.  I’ve been on the road a lot lately, so I haven’t really spent that much time with my boss.  But if I was feeling unappreciated at work, all I needed to do was pick up the phone and share what I was feeling professionally.  Mentoring and coaching was out there.  I just missed that opportunity.

I probably would have kept on missing it, kept stewing in my funk, if it had not been for one thoughtful, sincere compliment this morning.  It’s easy to get caught up in the business of work or life.  We dedicate blood, sweat and tears to whatever we are focused on and forget that we need a little nourishment ourselves.  As leaders, we constantly give.  It’s okay to receive too.  In fact, it’s mandatory if you want to stay sane and to grow.  And it spurs us on, giving us the energy to hop higher, work harder and accomplish great things.

If you’re feeling stifled, down or looking for motivation and it’s not coming to you, get up.  Go out and find it.  It’s waiting for you.  Seek out advice.  Ask questions.  And start listening.  TEN!  TWENTY!  YOU CAN DO IT!

Thanks, Jennifer, for helping me get my head on straight and reigniting that fire.


by Leave a comment

A Birthday Card to Mom

MomToday is my Mom’s birthday.  I’m on the road right now, so I sent flowers and called, but I still did not feel like I did enough.  And as I sat here in the hotel tonight, I started to think about how I viewed my Mom way back when and how I see her today.

Way back when – aka in my foolish teenage years – I loved my Mom and was absolutely certain that I was smarter than she was and knew more than she did.  Kind of a given for a teenager.  I thought Mom was beautiful.  Picture Mia Farrow, and you’re seeing my Mom.  She has always been one of a kind too: a little kooky.  Our house was filled with strays of the canine and human persuasion.  Mom couldn’t sing, but she sure did blast those Broadway records at full tilt boogie.  And with as many siblings as I’ve got, our house was raucous to say the least – balancing right on the edge of joy and madness.  I remember Mom standing in the middle of it all, always full of folksy sayings: trying to teach us – sometimes hollering over us – the things we may need to know as we grew.  We colored on the walls, ate dessert for breakfast and generally figured we ignored her advice.  And now I am grown with a family of my own.  I see my Mother when I look in the mirror.  I hear her voice come out of my mouth.  And I’ve realized how much she taught me when I didn’t think I was learning.  To celebrate her today, here are a few of my favorite Mom moments.

1.   Were you born in a barn?  (Also, known at dinnertime by the variant “Close your mouth. You look like a cow chewing its cud.”)  My Mom was raised on a farm, so we got a lot of country references when Mom talked about manners.  Manners were big for her.  She taught us to say please and thank you, of course.  And she also taught us that the world may judge you by your manners as well.  Being polite and considerate, thanking people, being gracious – they are points of entry into business today, and while they may not be directly acknowledged, they are noticed and appreciated.

2.   Just put ice cream on your cereal instead.  OK, so Mom usually resorted to this when we ran out of milk, but to a kid, ice cream on cereal is paradise so we were happy.  We ate ice cream for breakfast more than once.  Mom was resourceful.  Mom was creative.  She encouraged that in us kids too.  When she ran into a challenge, she found a solution, turned a tough time into something fun and moved right along.  Times will be tough for all of us at one point or another.  What matters is how we respond to problems and find creative answers.

3.   Time to get dewormed.  Now, that sounds icky, especially when you know that no one in the family (canine or human) ever actually needed to get dewormed.   But Mom was all about preventative measures.  Sometimes, even if everything seems fine, it’s still worth digging a little deeper to make sure things really are as good as they seem.  They well may be.  Or, you could find something that needs tending to.

4.   Don’t forget where you came from.  Mom has regaled me with stories of how my ancestors fought in the American Revolution and others worked on the Underground Railroad; how Dad ran secrets for the Filipino Guerrillas and Resistance forces during the Japanese occupation in WWII; how my Aunties had the most beautiful hands and made the best longanisa (which is very, very true).  In fact, I’m still hearing new stories today.  Mom taught me to be proud of my heritage – that my ancestors stood up for what they believed in and I should too.  She taught me that I am part of something so much more than just “me” and that Family, both gone and yet to come, is your true legacy.

5.   Patience is a virtue.  In this world of instant gratification, it’s easy to forget that some things are worth the wait.  This is a hard one for me, but it is true.  I found my career late, my husband late… found myself late.  They were worth the wait.  Today, I find that I say this same thing often to my children and to myself.  Day to day goals and pressures can make you crazy.  Set a long term goal.  Know what you stand for.  Then slow down, enjoy the ride and keep your eye on the finish line.  It’s a good one, after all.  Now, Mom: I know you are probably mortified that I wrote this tonight (especially # 3), and I hope you know I wrote this with love.  I treasure you.  I treasure what you taught me. You are more beautiful today than you were all those years ago, and I am so darn grateful for you and all that I’ve learned.  I succeed at business and life because of the sturdy foundation you and Dad built.

Happy Birthday, Mom.


by Leave a comment

Building Your House, One Brick at a Time

Every parent knows the story of the Three Little Pigs and the Big Bad Wolf, and has probably recited it hundreds of times.  Three brothers go out into the world, build their homes and get ready for the future.  Then, the Big Bad Wolf comes a knockin’, and you know what happens.  Homes of straw and sticks crumble, but the brother who really prepared – built a sturdy foundation – was able to withstand the storm and triumph.

Fairy tales are often built on common truths, and this tale is no exception.  Looking beyond the rhythm and rhyme, it’s a story about business and life: don’t take short cuts, be disciplined, and build a strong foundation of processes and knowledge as the unexpected will happen sooner or later.  When the Big Bad Wolf or another competitor comes knockin’, will your business stand strong or buckle under the storm?

So, I’m in the automotive industry, which is booming now.  Many industries are doing well.  But sooner or later, a storm will come and you need to be prepared.  One of the most basic bricks we can use to build our professional houses is building out your business and referral network.  Now, us marketing folk frequently talk about the importance of networking and the “how to” of it.  But marketing really is just about being human.  Human beings have a basic need to connect emotionally through relationships, and relationships can only be cultivated over time. You can’t build a relationship if you are sporadic in your marketing or networking, if you only “fit it in” when your phone isn’t ringing.  Building a relationship requires time and investment, perhaps a change in your thinking and actually doing things for others so they in turn will do things for you.  Ultimately, you are building your brand as you market.  In our business, to be successful, you should always be marketing – always be on.  You never know when you will meet someone special who just may change your life.  Marketing can happen every day via the phone, email, a blog and more.  Here are a few suggestions to help you expand your business network, and ultimately gain more trust and more referrals.

1. Get to know your industry well and share information.  Have you read a useful article or tidbit lately?  Share it.  If you want to succeed, become both a humble student and also an expert.  Constantly seek knowledge and spread it.

2. Send a thank you card or small token of appreciation that shows thought. I’m a big believer in handwritten notes.  E-mails are fine, but personal card takes care and time.  Even if you have said “thanks” in the past, don’t be afraid to say it again.  We have a saying in our family: “Practice an attitude of gratitude.”  I’m sure you have something similar at home too.  If you preach it at home, you certainly can put it into practice at work too.  The currency of business relationships is in the relationship itself. Build it with authentic care.

3. Take advantage of the opportunity to network inside and outside of your industry.  I was fortunate to attend a major auto industry event this week and rub shoulders with thought leaders from my industry, Google, Facebook and more.  That opportunity was a result of a long term relationship, and I am immensely grateful.  And earlier this year, I networked with CMOs from other verticals – Mattel, Disney and more.  It’s always an investment of time, and sometimes of your pocketbook, but the investment pays dividends.

4. Always carry cards.  Having your business card with you at all times is a given.  But how about carrying a few cards from those business contacts that you trust from another industry?  It’s an opportunity to help those who help you on a day to day basis.

5.  Follow up immediately on every referral.  I can’t stress it enough.

6. Volunteer your time and industry expertise for a project outside the scope of your normal business.  Get out there, get uncomfortable and get it done.

7.  Ask for referrals and cross-sell.  There is always more business than you are getting, and more referrals than you are receiving.  Make sure you share your story and successes with your partners, and ask for the opportunity to do more.

8.  Reach out to dormant accounts.  I’m going to wager that every one of you has at least one – if not more – “dormant” accounts. There may be reasons you’re not getting that referral, but you’ll never know unless you make that call.  You may need to apologize for not keeping in touch, but the relationship may well be redeemable and may have been “lost” purely because someone (or you) forgot to ring them.

Building a strong foundation in the good times will protect you if and when the Big Bad Wolf knocks on your door.  Get started today.


by Leave a comment

Song of Sondheim

West Side Story - Palais du Sport in Paris, 1999

West Side Story – Palais du Sport in Paris, 1999

“The air is humming, and something great is coming. Who knows?” – Steven Sondheim (West Side Story)

I’m a big fan of Sondheim and was fortunate for many years to tour in a number of productions of West Side Story as “Anita.” One of my favorite numbers in the show is “Something’s Coming,” sung early on. Natasha and I used to stand backstage during that number, bouncing along with nervous energy, feeling the excitement in Sondheim’s youthful lyrics and the change in the wind that Arthur Laurents’ mature yet soaring orchestrations created. The air truly did hum every night for over a year on that tour as we listened to a glorious melody. We knew something great – change – was just around the corner, for our characters and ourselves.

I was reminded of those long ago summer nights recently by a former colleague of mine. After spending a few hours reminiscing and talking about our future, he asked if I was afraid of change. “Of course not,” had been my reply, and I’d mentioned leaving the entertainment industry to take on a day job as an example. I still hold that day job today, though it comes with a longer title than it did back then. And adroitly, my friend mentioned that career change had been a long time ago (true). He asked again if I was afraid of change. After all, today I have a family that depends on me.  Change is a given these days, but change at 25 years old means something very different than change at the age I am today. And that’s a good thing. Change at 25 is moving to a different city, changing a college or changing a career. It’s all exciting and new, and back then, I dove in feet first with little thought in mind about the next 10-20 years.

Change today means so much more. I embrace change in a much different way. It’s no longer reckless abandon, but instead deeply felt, sometimes wistful, exciting, considered and with a vivid understanding of just how meaningful – and frankly, wonderful – change truly is. Change lives with us all every day. I see it illustrated before me as my children grow taller and my time with them under my roof and on this earth grows ever briefer. I embrace change at my office as people come and go through the years, and the DNA of the Company evolves too. I embrace change as a smart business person, as the market is changing, people are changing and the way we connect is changing. Technology races forward, regardless of whether or not we humble humans want to race along with it. Facebook has brought my family closer together than we were in the decades prior. I am now part of my brothers’ and sisters’ daily lives. In fact, we hold each other in the palms of our hands, thanks to the smartphone that I am writing this blog on, over 30,000 feet in the air on a plane.

It’s why I will always be a student of the world. If I want to succeed in business and make a mark in this industry, I have to constantly learn about how it is evolving – reading books, attending seminars, innovating. What worked 5 years ago may not be relevant today. And how can I stay successful and grow if I don’t know the destination?  Change is not coming though. Change is already here. If you cannot evolve, learn, embrace and love change, the world will soon leave you behind.

Of course, dear friend, I am not afraid of change. I would not be here today if I was, and my tomorrows in business and life would be very short. Change is the basic mode of life.  The air is humming, and something great is here.

I can’t wait to see what it is


by Leave a comment

Pep Talk

Star players on Team Family

Star players on Team Family

So, I am out at the Automotive Leadership Roundtable thanks to a good friend and a lot of networking (more on that another day). I came out here to learn about business, my industry, how it’s changing and how to inspire people. And who could be a better opening speaker for us this morning than Jack Harbaugh – famous coach, but even more famous father. He sure gave me a lot to think about this morning for work. But I’m walking away a better mother today than I was yesterday because I heard him speak.

Coach Harbaugh spoke extensively about putting the team before everything else, and how all good business decisions have to make things better for the team. Otherwise, it’s just not worthwhile. He talked about the value of persistence, outworking everyone around you and attacking each day with an enthusiasm unknown to mankind. He also reminded us that there are two teams that we need to focus on: the office and our family.

And the Coach hit hard when he said that “you cannot believe in yourself until you know someone believes in you”, that your children “have a right to know that you believe in them” and that you “shouldn’t coach-speak your kids.”

A few days ago, my boys were going bananas in the backseat of the car. I’d had a long and rough day, and I am not proud to admit that I snapped at them to be quiet. Luke apologized, and then Jake told him not to apologize, that “Mom won’t believe you.”

That hurt that evening, but not as much as it does today. That evening, I knew Jake said it because I tell him that “actions speak louder than words.” And often they do.

It hurts a lot more today because I am seeing the core of that statement instead of thinking about my action “lesson.” The core of that statement was that my son assumed that I did not believe in him or his brother.

That is so immensely far from the truth, as I think my kids are the greatest people on this earth – far better than I am. I tell Jake how great he is every day, how much I love him, how incredible he is. Yet, when it came right down to it that night, in the tough times for him, he did not think I believed in him. And I remember the beginning of the “actions speak louder than words” lesson. When he said I’m sorry the day before, I’d started with “I don’t really believe that… Actions yadda yadda yadda.” He had learned my “lesson.”

Man, I feel like dirt on that one. Yes, actions speak louder than words, but I forgot how powerful words can be.

When I get home from this conference, I am dropping that “lesson” at home and recrafting it, as I am not teaching him the lesson that I want him to learn.

Coach Harbaugh taught me today that there will be plenty of people in my kids’ lives that will coach-speak them, breaking things down in technique, criticizing them, tweaking them and more. My job is to lift them up: to tell them how much I believe in them, to tell other people how much I believe in them and make sure they see it demonstrated in my every action and unconditional support of them – always.

As the co-leader of Team Family, I am a better leader today than yesterday, and I’ve only just begun this journey. And this also translates to the people I am blessed to serve at work as a leader and mentor.

Thanks, Coach. Now I see.

The team. The team. The team.